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Month: November 2016

When nature calls, you gotta go

When nature calls, you gotta go

This particular incident was way back in 1996, when we (my family) went to a beautiful place called Kedarnath. I was seven then. We were trekking on one of the mountains in Himalayas, where Lord Shiva is worshipped as Kedarnath.

The place was filled with beautiful snow clad mountains and the view was simply breathtaking. The more we moved up the mountain, the more beautiful the view became.

It was an uphill trek. So, we had to take many halts during our journey. When we were midway up the mountain, we took a brief halt.

Finding no proper place to sit, elders rested on some medium size rocks. It was a somewhat level place with most of the ground covered with snow. One needed to stay warm in such cold weather. But being kids, we (me and my sister) couldn’t have enough of throwing snowballs at each other.

While playing, all of a sudden, it started feeling funny in my stomach. The pressure was mounting up in my bowel. It was so intense that, within a second, I realised I had to answer the call of nature right there.

I immediately rushed to my father. Since I didn’t have much time, I asked him to quickly suggest me a place where I could release this avalanche.

Fortunately, there was a big rock in the vicinity – big enough to hide a person behind it. Before my father could say anything, I ran off.

There was no one behind that rock. Quickly removing everything that caused an obstruction, I got in the position to do the job. After unloading everything that I possessed, I felt so relaxed. It was one of the best feelings.

When I was done, I realized I didn’t have the most important tool to finish the job – the water. The place was all covered with snow and there was nothing that I could use as an alternative. But then, I remembered an important lesson from school: that ice is nothing but frozen water. I thought I could use it.

The moment I applied ice to that sensitive area, I stood up involuntarily.

Everything went numb. It was freaking cold weather and using ice just made it worse.

It took me some time to come back to my senses. However, the process needed to be repeated again, as there was no other option.

With an immense amount of courage, I did it.

On the way back, my father asked me if everything went well. I simply nodded. But in the rest of the journey, I refrained from playing in the snow.

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The abusive parrot

The abusive parrot

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Not so long ago, my father narrated me a news article. It was published in a local Marathi newspaper. It goes like this…

There was an 85 year old lady who used to live in a small city. She would stay in a small house with her stepson and his wife. The stepson was the sole bread earner of the family. And he was alcoholic.

Every now and then, he would come home all drunk and would pick a quarrel with the old lady. It was over a property dispute.

One day, she got fed up with it and decided not to speak to him anymore.

It did stop the abusive slangs for her. But then they had a parrot.

One fine morning, when the old lady walked past the caged parrot, it started hurling abusive slangs at her. She found it strange at first. But it started happening frequently.

Whenever the bird would see her, it would abuse her.

The parrot would start its day by hurling Desi MC, BC slangs at the old lady. It would not spare her in front of anybody: be it her neighbours, her relatives or her friends. Soon, it became embarrassing for her.

The strangest thing was it would abuse only her and not the rest of the two in the family.  She had to do something about it.

Being tired of it, the old day handed the parrot to the Police. She even filed an official complaint saying it harassed her mentally.

To get to the truth, the police kept the bird in the custody and observed it. But it did not utter any foul word. Later, it was found out that the parrot was trained by her stepson to abuse the old lady –  which seemed obvious.

In the end, the parrot was handed over to the forest department.

What caught my fancy was its headline: “अश्लिल पोपट पोलिसच्या ताब्यात” (“Vulgar parrot in police custody”).

Courtesy: our media!

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